Money Pump Theory Is
Catch 22 Of An Idea
Observer
An editorial
in this very newspaper decried the plan by the federal government to stop
growth in places like
So now it is
finally common knowledge – that whoever is in charge federal money-pump can
make things happen. They can call the
shots. They can force you to build either hospitals or schools or neither.
This sudden
recognition of the money-pump concept staggered me. I never would have imagined
that our government would be so clever as to use money to get its way. I called my friend Feldsnooper to check this
out.
“You are
absolutely right,” he said. “We didn’t
think anyone would discover that money is our policy, but if it’s good enough
for big industry it’s good enough for US.”
“But
Feldsnooper, I would think that the money –pump would always be in the same
hands. That we citizens could depend on an even handed amount of pump-priming
and that money would be pumped evenly all over the country.”
“Well that
should be true but actually it depends on who is running the money-pump at any
given time. Sometimes it is the republicans, sometimes the democrats.”
“That’s basic
civics, Feldsnooper, everybody knows that.”
“You didn’t
let me finish. Sometimes it is the airlines, sometimes the railroads. Other
times the Korean lobby. The toughest group of all the combine of the Teamsters,
the Truckers, and General Motors lasted more than 20 years.”
“But General
Motors is private industry. What did anyone need the money-pump for?”
“To build
roads, dummy. You can’t drive a Buick on railroad tracks. And it doesn’t fly
either.”
You ain’t
kidding. The switch from trains to traffic from tracks to trucks was one of the
greatest vowel movements of all times. The opening shot was fired by Charlie
Wilson, the ex-head of GM in Eisenhower’s cabinet, who said ‘what’s good for
General Motors is good for the country,’ and from that day on we became a
growth economy. They poured money, then cement into roads, the steel into
bridges.”
“It sure
boggles the mind what the money pump did. Boy I’ll bet the oil companies
enjoyed those years.”
“Of course
they did. As a matter of fact the whole thing was their idea. After all, what
is an oil well but a money pump? When you have enough money you turn the well
off.”
“But doesn’t
it seem a bit strange Feldsnooper? I mean, after all, the money-pump is pumping
our tax dollars all over the place. They should be pumped back at US. How could
the people have let this happen?”
“What do the
people know?”
“Well, Feldsnooper,”
I said lamely, “I just don’t think it’s fair. The citizens should be in charge
of the money-pump.”
“That’s the
whole idea,” Feldsnooper explained. “The people think that they do run the
money-pump because whatever anyone does with it is always done for the benefit
of the people. When we give money away it is for the benefit of business. When
we fight a war with money it is for freedom; when we build roads it’s so you
can drive your car; when we go to the moon, it’s to preserve the moon for us.
we the people. I mean there is always a reason.”
”Where do all
the reasons come from?”
“The Money
Pump. It pumps money into the Think Tanks to dig up ideas to tell the people
why it’s good for them that the government is cutting down on Health Care, or
going to
“You mean to
win our freedom from George
“No dummy. The
English were running our money-pump. We wanted to run it ourselves.”
“Sure wish we
were running it now,” I lamented.